Time is not neutral. Every yes borrows from something else. When I say yes to work my heart is not in, I am taking time from the places I can serve best. That is not fair to our mission, our team, or the people we help.
Over the years I have learned a simple rule: if I cannot say “heck yes,” I should say no. Not because the work is unworthy, but because misaligned work dilutes the impact of aligned work.
Why this matters
- Energy is contagious. People can feel if you are half in.
- Quality follows commitment. “Heck yes” work gets your best attention and better results.
- Opportunity cost is real. A polite yes today can block a meaningful yes tomorrow.
- Service requires focus. Students, libraries, and leaders deserve our best, not our leftovers.
My “Heck Yes” filter
I keep it simple. Before I commit, I ask three questions:
- Purpose: Does this clearly advance our mission and goals?
- Energy: Do I feel genuine pull, not just obligation?
- Capacity: Can I give it focused time without stealing from higher priorities?
If I cannot answer yes to at least two, and ideally all three, I do not commit. I might explore. I do not promise.
Two categories that help
- Explore: Light touch. Learn, listen, and decide later. No deadlines. No deliverables.
- Commit: Full yes. Clear owner, timeline, and outcomes. On the calendar.
Most of the harm comes from putting “explore” items into the “commit” bucket.
A quick audit you can run today
Open your calendar and color code the next four weeks:
- Green: “Heck yes.” Work you would choose again.
- Yellow: Useful, but not in your sweet spot.
- Red: Obligations that drain energy or distract from mission.
Then adjust:
- Move one yellow to green by clarifying the outcome or delegating pieces.
- Convert one red to explore or end it cleanly.
- Protect space for one new green that you have been postponing.
How I say no without burning bridges
“Thank you for thinking of me. This is important work. I am focusing my time on a short list of ‘heck yes’ commitments this season so I need to pass. Here are two people or resources that could be a better fit.”
Or, if I want to learn more without committing:
“I am in ‘explore’ mode on this topic. I can do a 20-minute call to listen and point you to next steps. I cannot own a deliverable.”
What to do with the long maybes
Long maybes are the enemy. They consume mental space and build false expectations. I set a decision date: “I cannot give this what it deserves right now. If it is still helpful, please check back after March 15. I will have a clear answer then.”
Team effects
Leaders set the tone. When I accept misaligned work, the team learns to do the same. When I model a narrow, aligned yes, the team brings clearer proposals, and better work shows up. This is not about being precious with our time. It is about stewardship.
Where “no” creates bigger yes
- Ending a recurring meeting that no longer serves a purpose.
- Handing an initiative to someone for whom it is a “heck yes.”
- Saying no to a good project so you can say yes to a great one.
- Pausing a partnership until it aligns with the mission and the season.
A personal reminder I keep
“Full heart. Clear ‘why.’ Real time on the calendar.” If I cannot line up all three, I pause.
The leadership move
Do a 15-minute calendar audit today. Pick one red to end. Move one yellow to explore. Add one green that will matter a year from now. Then protect your yes like it matters, because it does.
